Grace to Trust Him More: Five Minute Friday & 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes Day 9


“Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus . . .” The words of the hymn struck me as though I was hearing them for the first time as I stood there in church. I was in my last trimester of pregnancy and things were so overwhelming. It had been a long and difficult pregnancy from spotting and severe nausea in the first trimester to extreme back pain and fatigue in the second and third.

“How would you feel about using that hymn for our son’s dedication?” I asked my husband in the car on the way home. I know it seemed silly, since our son wasn’t even born yet. He said it sounded good to him.

Two months later, I lay in a darkened labor and delivery room at four in the morning after a difficult 19 hour ordeal. We weren’t being moved to our room yet because of some clots and my passing out a few times. The baby had been taken to the nursery and I was encouraged to rest, having been awake for more than 24 hours at this point. My husband dozed on the recliner next to me but I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I felt like my throat was closing up. Every time I dozed off for a second I dreamed I was in labor again. Finally I began to hum to myself. Not sure where the tune came from, even that small amount of noise was painful on my throat, sore and raw from the moaning and then screaming through the natural delivery I hadn’t exactly planned on. But I didn’t know what else to do.

I was so tired I don’t know if I actually formed words and tried to sing, but the words swept through my mind even as the cracked and sour notes came.

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er;
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
Oh, for grace to trust Him more!

In that moment I was too tired to argue, or even to worry. There was much uncertainty and fear but in that moment I did the only thing I knew to do, I reminded myself of the truth. It wasn’t some grand moment of great faith. Just the tiny bit of strength I had left clinging to my Rock and trying to believe that things would get better.

It’s hard to believe that it was only a bit longer than three weeks since that early morning. Not much has gone the way I expected. School work has been slow, my children have fought what feels like constantly. I have fallen painfully behind on the blog series I planned, simple as it was. My house has experienced the constant coming and going of workmen as the bathroom renovation we started before the baby arrived has run overtime and over budget. I’ve had plenty of moments of discouragement and even despair.

But today I’m choosing to remind myself of those same words on truth.

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease;
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life and rest, and joy and peace.


Categories: 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes as a Family of Five, 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes, Five Minute Friday, Writing | Tags: , , , , | 2 Comments

Calling: 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes as a Family of Five

I hear their voices early in the morning. Sometimes I’m in the bathroom. Other times I made it to the kitchen table. Mostly I’m still in bed. Sometimes it’s the sweet request to come and cuddle, others it begins with shrieks and whines and I want to pull the covers back over my head.  But I have no choice but to start the day. I drag myself into a sitting position and wait for my ligaments and joints to settle before I try to put weight on my legs. These final weeks of pregnancy have not been kind. We are soon to be a family of five.

Sometimes the pain feels like too much and I wonder if I can really do this. But I know that somehow I will muddle my way through as I have two times before. That eventually the memory of the pain will fade, my body will heal and someday I’ll have energy again. That the sound of their voices will change and soon they won’t be knocking on my door, but getting themselves up and ready to start the day. I look forward to that day, yet I know when I comes some small part of me will grieve the end of the early morning call.

I wrote this particular post before the recent birth of our third child, but I loved the picture of my daughter with him, so I used to anyway. 


Categories: 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes as a Family of Five, 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes as a Family of Five


It was an interesting experience last year, trying the 31 days challenge for the first time, and joining the sub-community of 5 Minutes Free Writes. Without that I don’t know if I would have had the guts to try it. This year I am due to deliver our third child just before the challenge starts.  (Update: He actually arrived a bit early, giving me a week or two to recover). But I think I will try it anyway. Some of my posts will be pre-written, so you may find yourself reading the words of a late term or post due mama or the exhausted mom of a newborn, depending on the day or week.

Last year I decided to focus my challenge on taking pictures of my kids each day and reflecting on life with them. This year I will be musing on our transition to being a family of five. There will no doubt be some pictures, but I can’t promise new one’s every day. As last year brought me through some interesting experiences including the decline and death of my grandmother just before the 31 days and her funeral during the challenge, I know this year will present its own terms that may both inspire of stifle my creativity. I look forward to seeing what happens and I hope you will read (and perhaps write) along with me.


Day 1: Calling

Day 9: Trust – Grace to Trust Him More

Categories: 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes as a Family of Five, 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes | Tags: , , | Leave a comment

Prenatal Core Week 6: Postpartum Recovery


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Postnatal Plan

I really appreciate Kelly bringing this up. After the baby is born don’t obsess about recovery in the beginning. The important thing, is to connect with your baby. Splinting afterwards is helpful, if you find it comfortable. If not, don’t worry about it and pick it up later.

I probably haven’t gotten as much out of this program as I would have liked, but I really like Kelly’s reminder to integrate the various stretches and abdominal engagements throughout things you are already doing after baby is born. When you nurse the baby, when you change the baby, when you pee. Since the last week or two of this program I’ve mostly been doing integrated motion. I have trouble counting and remembering to get everything in, but I try to use certain triggers throughout the day to help me. (Sitting for meals, brushing my teeth, standing in the kitchen, etc.)

Transitioning back to fitness. Fit2B Studio continues to be my primary plan. It will be hard to really slow down and take it from the beginning but those Foundational Five will probably be all that I can manage in the beginning anyway.



Since I originally wrote this post, I had my baby!

Simon Edward Vitaro was born on Tuesday September 15. (It’s hard to believe it’s already been more than a week). He came nine days early and after a 19 hour labor, which is the longest of my three. I’m sure I’ll be sharing more details in the future, but I just wanted to briefly highlight how The Tummy Team helped during my labor and delivery. By the end of my pregnancy I was splinting almost constantly which I continued during my labor, including pushing. I believe this helped a lot by taking pressure of the muscles and ligaments. I also made good use of belly breaths during contractions, at least until close to the end. I’ll admit that when the time to push came, I wasn’t thinking about proper pushing form and technique, it just kind of happened and very quickly. So hopefully I didn’t totally destroy my core as my little boy entered the world at top speed.

I’ve also been splinting postpartum and feel as though things are shrinking down much faster than my last two. Knowing that the splint is helping to hold my core together while I recover is giving me some peace of mind as I mostly focus on rest and taking care of my baby.

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The Tummy Team

Categories: Fit2B Studio, The Tummy Team, Women's Health | Tags: , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Fit2B New Moms: Week 2


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It is getting very hard to stay active at this point in my pregnancy. We just came through another high temperature week with very high eighties and low nineties, which is way too hot for this pregnancy lady. So walking or even going outside much has been out of the question. It has been hard to keep myself going with any kind of exercise. But I want to make sure I’m still ready for this upcoming (hopefully sooner rather than later) delivery.

Day 1

Totally Transverse
Maternity Mix I

I’ve done this workout before, but it has been a while and I wasn’t sure how my current condition would work with it. There were portions that I had to be very cautious and really listen to my body (especially the side leg series) but mostly I found it to be a great way to keep my body moving, even when it takes a lot of effort and it’s easier to stay still.

Day 2

Mula Bandha
Maternity Mix II
Pregnancy Stretching with Kelly

This was a great workout. While Maternity Mix II is a little more physically demanding, it is also a bit shorter which helps with that. As usual the Pregnancy Stretching with Kelly is a big hit and something I strive to work in daily where I can. I felt very confident today, as I was able to do almost everything in this workout. This makes me feel better since my mobility has been so limited lately. It’s possible my efforts to do something, no matter how minimal, everyday are paying off.

Day 3

Totally Transverse II
Maternity Mix III

This is definitely a more ambitious workout than the other two maternity mixes. While I’ve done it before, I’ll admit that this time I had to stop halfway through. Next time I do it I might have to try it without the dumb bells. As I’m getting so close to the end, (hopefully just a couple weeks now) I want to stay active but I also don’t want to workout to the point of exhaustion. Bethany Learn always says you should feel energized after a workout and ready for your day, not so tired that you need to go back to bed. I’m trying to find where that fine line is this pregnancy.

Day 4

Basic Transverse & Mula Bandha
Maternity Yoga 
Neck Routine

I enjoyed this gentle combination. I’m looking forward to the slightly more tummy safe refilm of Maternity Yoga but this one is still totally doable. The neck routine was also welcome respite for my sore neck and upper back. Plus, any opportunity to workout while sitting down is also great.

Guess what? Only four days this week. This whole project is turning out a bit different than I planned. Rather than getting progressively more difficult, each week I’m doing a little less, but striving to at least do something. So if I do in fact make it through week 3 and 4 of this routine, you’ll see lots of stretching, gentle maternity workouts and Foundational Five, rather than my usual fare of solid aerobics and strong Pilates.

But I know I’m not the only pregnant lady who feels like just moving at all by the end is difficult, let alone official exercise. Don’t be discouraged (I’m trying not to be). You will be able to do these things again. Just try to focus on taking care of yourself and baby for these last few weeks.

Fit2B New Moms: Week 1


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Categories: Fit2B Mama, Fit2B New Moms | Tags: , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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