No Mom Alone: Five Minute Friday

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Photo Credit: Arsh_86 via Compfight cc

For a long time I thought I was the only one. The only one who lived for nap and bedtime. The only one who cringed at the pounding sound of little feet running through the house and the inevitable crashes that followed. I would look at them at as they slept at night and wonder how children so beautiful could produce such anger, frustration and resentment during their waking hours.

Now child three is on the way. Another boy, and likely, I fear, to be as wild and crazy as his older brother. As I share my body daily with this little one, I long for the occasional moment of solitude. Because the truth is I haven’t been alone for the last eight months, (though I’ve probably only been aware of that fact for the last three or four).  After this little one joins the world, he’ll be attached to be almost as often as when he was in utero so I can’t anticipate too much time alone, except for the occasional shower.

But since my first child, I’ve discovered the truth. I am not the only one. Lots of moms feel the way I do and we are not bad moms. We can debate how the pioneer women survived or why moms in the fifties seemed to have it all together. (Personally, I think it was a combination of cocktails and sending kids out to play all day long from the time they could walk). We can only figure out how to help each other now, in the world we live in. Whether it means encouraging healthy use and attitude toward social media (especially Pinterest and Facebook) or looking for ways to get each other out of the house without the kids whenever possible. Rejecting comparison in favorite of connection. We don’t have to do this alone.

 

I want to take this moment to encourage you to find a support group of moms near you. If you haven’t heard of MOPS, check it out and see if there is a chapter near you. I’ve been involved with my local MOPS group for six years, from the time my daughter was three months old. I’ve been a leader at times and right now I’m just an attendee. But the group has been a source of support for me in my years as a mom and I can’t imagine continuing on without it and the relationships I’ve built through it. 

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Reflections on my Final Weeks of Pregnancy: Five Minute Friday

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They couldn’t find a heartbeat, where one had been just a few weeks before and everything changed overnight. Instead of eating crackers and making plans I was arranging for a hospital procedure and care for my daughter during the recovery.

Then four years later, I sat in a different exam room, thinking that this was all happening all over again. Except it wasn’t. It was just too early, the tech said. She didn’t give us any guarantees but told us that she couldn’t tell us for sure either way.

Two weeks later we heard the most beautiful sound, the heartbeat of our baby. Now, all these months later as I’m trudging through the final weeks of what has been a difficult pregnancy I find myself remembering those fearful days of uncertainty. The other night he didn’t move for a while (at a time of day when he is usually most active) and nothing seemed to motivate him to do so; all those feelings came rushing back and I saw myself losing yet another child. But fortunately he finally woke up and wiggled around enough to let me know he was OK and the following day’s scheduled ultrasound confirmed that all is well.

I just can’t wait to finally hold him on the outside. (Or let someone else take a turn holding him, as the case may be). I see what his face looks like beyond the 3D ultrasound. (So far he seems to resemble his brother and sister a great deal). I wonder if he has hair and if he’ll be a better sleeper than his siblings. I worry that he’ll get this brother’s food allergies and both their tempers. But mostly I just want to be able to look into his face and tell him that he is loved, and special and that being third doesn’t mean he is any less. He is wanted, yearned for and found.

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Fit2B Mama Week 3

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Wow, Week 3 is done and I am feeling it. At 34 weeks, I’m definitely finding that I cannot be as active as I used to be. But I’m still going to keep active as much as possible.

Day 1

Mula Bandha, Pilates in Pajamas

I haven’t done Pilates in Pajamas since I’ve been so far along in this pregnancy. But it wasn’t so bad. I modified several of the movements and definitely did the simplest option for most of the sections. But I still felt like I was getting a workout and keeping my body moving.

Day 2

Totally Transverse II, Pilates in Pajamas II, Pregnancy Stretching

I found Pilates in Pajamas II to be a little more challenging, and I made limited use of the weights but still felt like this could be modified to do during pregnancy. Pregnancy Stretching is always a welcome addition. I have most of the stretches memorized now, so I can do them with or without the video.

Day 3

Basic Transverse & Mula Bandha, Tabata

I really like this as a maternity workout. The intervals make it easy to pause and catch my breath. Though I did shorten the workout slightly by not doing the last part on my back. But it was still a good routine. It is long, but I still think it’s worth the time and effort.

Day 4

Totally Transverse, Balanced, Simply Stretching

Balancing is really my favorite part of this workout. Yes, there are weights involved and I had to modify it in sections, but the best part is feeling how much I am still able to balance, even this far along.

I have to be so gentle doing Simply Stretching because of how tender so many of my muscles and joints are right now. But this workout contains a very significant stretch for me. The modified hurdler’s stretch is the only thing I’ve found that gently stretches my inner thigh and hip (as in where the ball and socket join together) which is where I have the majority of my pain especially at night. It’s a slow moving workout and it can be difficult to psyche myself up to do it sometimes but I’m always glad I did.

Day 5

Kelly Dean’s Total Body Workout

This workout continues to be one of the most well balanced ones on Fit2B. I definitely felt my tummy muscles were tired and my lower back was a little bit sore, but I got through it. Similar to Tabata, you can always take a break between sets or sections if you need to. At eight months pregnant I’m glad I can still even get through this one. I love that it incorporates everything I need, including stretches with no required equipment.

Day 6

Maternity III

While it does incorporate weights, this is still a very healthy pregnancy workout. Beth does include some stretching, but if you are like me and need lots of stretching, feel free to add a few of your own or do an additional stretching workout. Sometimes I had to do fewer reps than recommended with the weights and be very mindful of my stretched out core, but that’s OK. Better to do quality but simple movements than harder movements in poor alignment or with a compromised core.

I decided to only make this a six day workout schedule because I also took a few walks this week and I didn’t want to overtax myself with workouts on top of it. As I head into month eight of this pregnancy I’m going to be easing up a little bit on my schedule; fewer days, shorter workouts. But I don’t want to stop altogether because I want to have something left to actually deliver this baby with. Plus, hopefully that will make it easier to return to exercise after the baby is born. Next week I’ll be starting a series of reviews of all the workouts recommended on the Fit2B New Mama pathway, which is designed to be for pregnancy as well as postpartum. I hope you will join me.

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Fit2B Mommy: Relaxation and Recovery as Needed

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I had a great set of routines planned to share with you all during the first trimester, then I had the worst first trimester ever and didn’t start exercising again until almost 14 weeks. So if you have easy first trimesters and are able to stay super active, I will make suggestions of additional workouts you can add to what I suggest below.

One of the best things you can do during pregnancy is walk. (Really all the time, but pregnancy too). So I start by automatically saying, walk as many days of the week as you can manage, even if it’s only a short walk. Even if it means taking the kids along (and walking at their pace) or hauling them in the stroller.

My first trimester (or early second trimester if you’ve taken some time off from exercise and are just starting back again) include starting slow.

As always, the Foundational Five are crucial. Try doing one of them every day.

The other routines I recommend include:

Kelly’s Pregnancy Stretching

PMS Routine

Kelly’s Total Body Stretching

Pelvic Floor Connections

Restorative Poses

Core Wake Up

Vertical Core Training 

Tummy Safe™ Transitions

Squat Prep Tips

If you are feeling up to something a little more aerobic, besides walking, I also like Basic Aerobics II, III, or IV.

I recommend doing these routines for about two weeks until you feel comfortable. If it feel easy after the first week, that’s a good opportunity to add basic aerobics.

Next week, we’ll be picking up with the new Fit2B Beginning and then transitioning to my own maternity exercise combos which have been working well for me so far, now that the nausea is fading. It all seems appropriate given that we are beginning an important journey towards a healthy pregnancy.

The Tummy Team Online Core Training Programs

Don’t forget the Tummy Team Mother’s Day Sale!

May 5-15, 201530% OFF ALL ONLINE PROGRAMS
15% OFF ALL ABDOMINAL SPLINTS
15% OFF ALL TUMMY CREMES

The Tummy Team Core Foundations Online Program

You can use the coupon code laundryblog to save 30% off a Fit2B Studio yearly membership.

Or check out the Fit2B Store for other great healthy living products.

Shop the Fit2B Online Store