We’ve Got This: Five Minute Friday


Photo Credit: ryeckman Flickr via Compfight cc

I hate that I couldn’t handle it alone. I love to write but technology is not my forte. So whenever I need something, it’s computer programmer husband to the rescue. He gamely offered to help me with some blog research last night which led to a multi-hour drama after I clicked the wrong button. (I firmly believe that everything in life should have an undo button).

Then at 4 AM the smoke alarm started chirping. Of course we couldn’t figure out which one it was. I know my husband doesn’t do well with early morning wakings and I desperately wanted to take care of it myself so he could sleep. An hour later after changing three batteries, he gave up on sleep and I crashed for another hour or two, but not before feeling guilty that I was sleeping and he was awake, headed exhausted into another workday.

I know marriage is supposed to be a team, but sometimes I hate how much I need him. Because I worry that someday if he isn’t there I won’t be able to make it on my own. In a generation that is teaching women self-reliance, after seeing other women flounder after losing husbands to death or divorce I feel like I should be able to do it all on my own.

At the same time, I love knowing that he has my back. He may be cranky at 4 AM, but he takes care of whatever the problem is. He got up with the babies when they were small, and even now when they get sick in the night. I don’t know why I’m so stuck on the idea that I need to be enough on my own.

Maybe it’s just important that I know I can do all the stuff, but that I’m lucky enough not to have to. We share the load not because I am less capable but based on preference and gifting. It doesn’t mean I’m not good enough, but that I have a partner who is equal to this difficult task we have taken on; to share a life and build a family. With God’s help, we’ve got this. Neither of us has to labor alone.

So, Hon, if you are reading this half asleep at your desk at work; thanks again for everything you did last night. Hopefully there’s a full night’s rest coming your way.




6 thoughts on “We’ve Got This: Five Minute Friday

  1. I can certainly relate to leaving IT tasks to a husband in the industry as well as feeling guilty for relying on him for areas he’s just so much better at than I am. 25 years in and still working on that one! We shouldn’t get complacent but also need to remember that we are a team, making up a whole together. God bless you both x Your FMF Neighbour (no. 31)

    1. Thanks for stopping by! I often have to remind myself that I don’t have to do it all, because he is willing and able to help most of the time. Now I just need to figure out how to ditch the guilt.

  2. I totally feel you on this one, Bethany! My hubby seems to get “better and better” with each passing day. More thoughtful… more loving… more amazing… and guilt finally escaped me the day I realized he was fulfilling the role “as Christ loved the church”. God’s love is so rich there’s simply no way to ever compete with that!! So ditch the guilt sister, and just lavish in the love. Yes we’re so unworthy… but He’s so willing!!! Thanks for this reminder today.

  3. I love this!! It points out the beauty of the mundane and the simply joys of having someone do life with us! My husband had to get up really early Monday morning to jumpstart my car bcs I accidentally left the lights on all night (oops)! I probably could’ve figured it out if I had to and I really did try, but I couldn’t figure out how to open the hood of his car…hated waking him up, but he got my car up and running w/o any problem and he was even happy he could do that! It’s a gift that we don’t have to navigate these things alone…maybe one day we might have to, but we’ll enjoy it while we can!
    ~Joining you from FMF

    1. Oh man, we have had several chirping smoke detector nights! Several times we wandered around the house waiting for it to chirp (every 10-15 minutes) and rushed to where we thought it was! Finally, after several hours we discovered that it was an old CO detector in a drawer. Life is so crazy sometimes. I’m so glad that God “puts the lonely in families” (and that later in, we can laugh about it).
      I used to worry about what might happen too and if I’d be okay, but God really challenged me to live fully trusting Him. He’s good enough to be enough for me whatever might come, and worrying about it now just invites fear into my heart.

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