So much about my life can be defined by expectations. In a world where we are constantly urged to reach for the moon and told anything is possible, I find my needing to do the opposite. I’ve learned to lower my expectations. Or rather I should rephrase that. I am continually learning to lower my expectations while simultaneously battling my unrealistic and idealistic ones.
My inner desire for my house to be clear for more than 30 seconds. To have a complete and uninterrupted thought. These don’t seem entirely unrealistic. Until three children enter the picture and suddenly neither is likely to happen ever again.
I kept trying to let things go, hoping that eventually I’d find what I was looking for. But the fact is, sometimes we just have needs but they can be met in unexpected ways. I may want my house clean and quiet, but I need to find a way to experience rest and peace. I may want my children to be unconditionally well behaved and obedient, but I need to train they to take care of themselves one day and still maintain a loving connection with them as they grow and develop.
I haven’t figured out how all of this looks or works yet in our family. Because every family, child, season of life is different. But I’m learning to expect less and trying desperately to focus on the successes rather than failures. I’m praising the effort and work, even if the outcome isn’t what I’d hoped. I’m continuing to strive for the kind of life and relationships I want even if it doesn’t look at all how I was expecting.
Want to join us? Find out more here.