If I Could Tell Them: Five Minute Friday

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This week’s prompt is Tell

I tell them Mommy can’t stand the noise anymore. But they don’t understand that what I really want to say is that I feel like I want to unzip my body and run away sometimes, because I love them so much it scares me and I don’t want to hate them someday for sucking me dry with every bit of life I have and then growing up and leaving me.

I tell them they can’t disrespect me with their speech, when inside all I want to do is cry and scream that don’t they realize how much I do for them. I would die for them. I do die for them, a little bit every day, every hour when I put my own needs to the side to take care of them.

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I tell them that I love them, that they are smart and beautiful. But I can’t explain to them what exactly that means. That I think they are amazing, not because they are perfect, but because I believe God has great and things for their lives. I will challenge them, push them, love them, discipline them and comfort them all the days of my life because they are part of me.

I tell them to please give me five minutes to try and get my thoughts out and still managed to be interrupted at least three times by everything from wrestling match gone awry, items thrown in anger and the urgent need for scissors.  I don’t know how to tell them that they drive me crazy but I wouldn’t want my life any other way. (Ok, if I’m honest I could live with a little less noise and a lot less mess, but not if it meant being without them).

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4 thoughts on “If I Could Tell Them: Five Minute Friday

  1. First of all, I love the name of your URL. Secondly, as the mother of grown sons, the noise stops eventually and then all you wish for is the insane chaos that is childhood and it makes me happy you get it! Embrace it! Love it! Enjoy every crazy hair raising day of it! Love and encouragement from your neighbor at FMF. ❤️😊

    1. Thanks for stopping by. I think Fridays are often rough days around here and I’m working on embracing the happy moments in the crazy.

  2. I understand everything you have written. Sometimes I wonder who I even am besides Mom! I have learned that I am still in there, and as my kids older, I rediscover who I am a little bit more. Because I have changed so much anyway! The old me (pre-kids) isn’t who I am anymore. It will be fun to see who the new me is!

  3. i love your phrase you want to unzip and run…except that being a mother dresses you down to your bones…it never leaves. you’ll never unzip that mamas heart. i experience this wrestle of chaos and quiet, exhaustion and spurts of enthusiastic joy…lets be honest sometimes its hard and yet we know its flying fast

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