This week’s prompt is Fill.
I’d like to go. But there is a line that stretches behind the rows of chairs and my son requires both his parents to keep him under control during the service. It seems like a simple invitation. Prayer to receive more of the Holy Spirit. I know God walks with me with my daily life. I know this is true or I wouldn’t still be here. I would have jumped off this crazy train long ago. Who wouldn’t? Life is hard, parenting is hard. But I don’t feel God’s presence the way I used to. My days are so full and so loud. There aren’t many moments to listen for the still, small voice of God because there is rarely stillness. I see my copy of Brother’s Lawrence’s Practicing the Presence of God on my kitchen table as I wrangle the kids through breakfast and get them packed into the car for church. I’ve been meaning to read it. I wish I could find a moment, not just the time to do it, but the clearness of mind to really absorb it.
But one Sunday, there is no line. Just an elder of church and his wife. The very one’s who helped prepare us for our marriage more than 11 years ago and still advise us whenever we ask. So I go and I stand there and they begin to pray. Without me saying a word they begin to pray for a new experience of the peace and joy of the Lord. How did they know this is exactly what I need more of? I accept it and thank them, returning to my seat to help my husband corral the children. I try to dip into that well as I go into my week. How can I be more filled when my life already feels so full, too full so often? I don’t know the answer precisely. But I know that if I am open to receive, some how the room will be made. So I dutifully find the moments to seek, hoping to be found.
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