Talk Less: Mindset for Moms

Sunday morning in Piazza del Popolo, Nov 2009 - 46

Photo Credit: Ed Yourdon via Compfight cc

OK, so I hated hearing this. Anyone who knows me, knows I love to talk. I usually have a lot to say. My brain goes quickly and I often figure things out by talking them out. So yeah, I usually do plenty of talking. I appreciate Jamie’s clarification. She’s talking about negative speech. Again, ouch. I do way too much complaining, especially after a hard day spent with the kids. I do have rough days and I can acknowledge that without going into a complete negative tirade.

“Don’t allow every thought or feeling you have rush out of your mouth the moment you have them.” This is something I have really been working on, especially when it comes to my husband and kids. What makes it harder is that when I’m making a real effort and no one notices. I’ll tell my husband that I think I’ve really been doing better when it comes to my complaining and he looks blankly at me and informs me that it seems as bad as even. That can be discouraging, but I can’t stop trying. Because the truth is, I’m not just doing it for him. I’m not trying to win a prize or award, I’m trying to improve my life. My efforts are not wasted, even if they aren’t noticed immediately. If it improves my attitude, it will still positively influence my home even if no one notices the absence of my negative words.

I also thought Jamie made a great point when she said to evaluate how you feel after speaking. Sometimes, trying to talk through a bad situation makes it seem more bearable. But a bit girlfriend whine session may leave me feeling even more unsatisfied with my life. A long conversation with my husband may help me feel more positively about a struggle in my life, or it may turn into an hour long vent after which I feel worse than before and I’ve made him feel worse as well. It’s not just what we say, but how we say it, when we say it and what the outcome is. So for the next week I’m going to try again, to focus on speaking positive words over my life and situations.

I’ve been faced with a few difficult situations lately where I wasn’t treated with a great deal of respect. But I’m trying hard not to feel angry or bitter about it. Not because I’m looking for some kind of “Good Christian” award, but because I know that rehashing offenses and holding grudges only hurts me. I may tread more lightly when faced with similar situations in the future, but I chose to speak positive words over myself and my future interactions. So join me this week and try to hold back those poisonous words that we often spew at others and ourselves, and instead speak life.

 

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